SMS Conversation from yesterday:
Today reporter: Final dumb question i promise. What is your pre party ritual?
Me: Tantric sex with wombats
Today reporter: Fine will print that. and tomorrow everyone will know of your marpusial fetish
Me: Its marsupial. Their names are pinky and sweetie
We spoke later, and i told her more about pinky and sweetie, my small but amazingly flexible punjabi wombats. How could they be punjabi? she asked. Well, their parents moved to Australia for a higher standard of living, so technically they are Australian, said i.
Later in the evening, i went through my pre party ritual with p and s and then went to the outlook party. i am the worst dancer in the world, but went through it nevertheless, boogieing fulltime with the ever-glamorous shobita. undoubted star of the night was ajit pillai, whose ‘outlook rap’ had us all spellbound. came home reasonably late, to find stoob, glassy-eyed, watching 30 seconds of fame.
today is christmas eve. hopefully chapters 4-11 will be read today. somewhere out there, my sister is grinding her teeth as her motherinlaw, currently staying with her, embarks upon the 356th chronicle of Baby Jesus.
Astonishingly, I have a wombat on my shirt today – it’s from Australia, the shirt I mean. The picture caption says ‘Viva la Wombat’.
Do wombats taste good?
Wombat provoke Jabbervoke
so Jabbervoke combat wombat
(Is this haiku, or something else? I’ve always wanted to write haiku)
this is all very nice, but stay away from my wombats. there are plenty out there. because right now, my wombats are all i have.
oh, and a copy of today newspaper which calls me a party regular.